Losing Your Child: A shopping nightmare!

By Samantha Wilson

Shopping is hard work: especially with the kids in tow.
Just as you think you’ve found the perfect item, you are paralyzed. You can’t breathe.
Something is wrong. Very wrong.
There is no familiar tug on your arm. Your stomach lurches, your eyes widen. Panic sets in.
In literally a flash, you are overwhelmed with reality: your child is gone.

Time is critical. It can literally mean the difference between life and death. If your child is missing in a mall - how you react, how the store employees respond, and how your child deals with his fear are crucial.

If everyone – including your child - knows how to act, a lost child is not as vulnerable as you might believe.

Parents should:

Immediately alert store staff and mall security that your child is missing – many stores have established plans and can take immediate action.
Give a clear description of your child to store security and other shoppers. Clothing is easier to identify than height and weight.
Always carry a current photo of your children in your wallet.
Make sure the store notifies police. If your child is found quickly, you can cancel the request.

Again, time is critical

Direct security to cover all exits. If your child attempts to leave the store alone or with another person, they will be noticed.
Continuously yell out your child’s name. Draw as much attention as you can to the fact that your child is missing. Do not be embarrassed.
Think about where you saw him last and return to that part of the store.
Ask EVERYONE to help search
Think of where your child feels comfortable in that store or mall. They may go to a familiar place.
Was your child asking to go or see some particular event or place that interested them – they may have given up waiting for you and gone ahead

Think like your child. What would they do if they were lost and scared?

When a child is lost, the more people looking, the more likely he will be found. If all exits are blocked, it’s harder for a predator to leave with the child. A predator is not interested in abducting a child that everyone is looking for because it is far too risky.

Children should understand that they will not be lost forever: that at some point, they will be found and reunited with their parents. They must, however, know how to keep safe.

Kids should:

STOP! As soon as you realize you are lost, DON’T MOVE!
LOOK! Look with your eyes, not your feet. Your parents are looking for you!
LISTEN! Listen for someone calling your name. Listen for a store announcement on the intercom about your parents looking for you.
CALL OUT! Yell for your mom or dad! Draw attention to yourself that you are lost. Kids who make lots of noise alarm predators! And your parents are listening for you, too.

Work with your children.

Teach your child to never go anywhere with anyone without asking first.
Teach your children to keep their head up, look around and maintain a distance from strangers. If someone feels threatening, YELL. Predators are not interested in assertive kids. They want kids who are weak, scared and vulnerable.
Teach your child what to do if they are lost: Stop, Look, Listen, Call Out!
For practice, have your child point out people that they believe “look safe.”
Under your supervision, have your child approach the person and ask for the time. Talk about how that felt to them and why they chose that person.

My kids are my gift. I look at them daily, and can’t believe how lucky I am. Best-case scenario: plan ahead, hire a babysitter, and finish shopping on your own. But if you must take your children with you, be prepared, and resist distractions.

Ultimately, it is not up to your kids to protect themselves. That’s your job. Don’t wait until you are the parent with a missing child. Take action now.

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